Don't Pick Up The Soap

Is there no end to the mindless stupidity of the people who live around us? Sometimes they manage to breathe and talk at the same time but that's about their limit. And they are allowed to vote, too.

For example, who could believe that the library at HMP Erlestoke near Devizes, Wilts, includes books such as Escape by David McMillan, which describes how he broke out of Thailand's "Bangkok Hilton" prison?

A book by Tim Carroll about great escapes during World War Two is also available, according to The Sun.

Gloucester Prison library stocks biographies of high-profile criminals including notorious London gangsters the Kray twins and "Mad" Frankie Fraser.

The life story of Charles Bronson is available at Doncaster prison. Bronson has had a seven-year sentence repeatedly extended for serious crimes, including wounding with intent and threats to kill, GBH and false imprisonment.

The catalogue of "inappropriate" books, which was collated by the Conservatives, also includes Pretty Boy, the story of Roy Shaw, an armed robber who assaulted prison guards while jailed.

Dominic Grieve, the Shadow Justice Secretary, told The Sun: "It beggars belief that books glorifying crime and violence are being made available to prisoners."

A Prison Service spokesweasel said: "New instructions on prison libraries will make clear that if a particular item is inappropriate, it can be considered for removal - governors have already done this in some cases."

TheEye once went to a library and tried to borrow a book on suicide but was told to sod off because he wouldn't bring it back.